Occupy Sesame Street Protests Bring Muppets Together
Sesame Street – Muppets have gathered at the center of Sesame Street behind the rally cry, “We are the 99%”. Their focus is the food inequality they face against the growing consumption gap between the upper 1% of Sesame Street and the remaining 99% of the muppets. The protesters have begun camping out in the public parks of Sesame Street to strengthen their protest’s ideology.
One of the signs created by Sesame Street protesters.
Analysts point to President Big Bird’s government bailout of Cookies, Inc. (owned by the Cookie Monster) as the main cause for these protests. The Cookie Monster could not be reached for comment, but one of his spokesmuppets stated,”The Cookie Monster does not believe these muppets have a valid argument. Their lack of organization and unifying message renders their protests useless.”
An anonymous muppet responded to this statement by saying, “Our unifying message is clear: the Cookie Monster has been rewarded for his company’s failures at the expense of the muppets’ food supply. We have very little cookies to disperse to our population while the Cookie Monster consumes them at an appalling rate.”
The Protesters Face an Uphill Climb
The Occupy Sesame Street protesters have already faced arrests for camping in public parks. Sesame Street Police Department Police Chief, the Count, has began bragging about the amount of protesters that have been arrested. “185 Ah Ah Ah” stated the Count at an SSPD press conference regarding this matter.
Such statistics astound the average Muppet
Regardless of the legalities and legitimacy of this movement, many protesters have been outspoken and are bonding together through their common messages. Blue collar hero Oscar the Grouch declared, “Many are too wrapped up in Bert and Ernie’s gender identity and the Count’s addiction to numbers that they forget who is really corrupting Sesame Street. Occupiers have joined together to raise muppet awareness of the criminal activity on Sesame Street.” Oscar then returned to his trash can where he was not available for further comment.
President Big Bird’s lack of commentary to the movement may end up hurting the president in a bid for re-election. It will be interesting to see if these protests manifest any political/economical change on Sesame Street.